My youngest daughter Samirah was 16 when she was diagnosed with Crohn’s disease, a type of inflammatory bowel disease that can lead to abdominal pain, severe diarrhoea, fatigue and malnutrition. Due to this, she experienced severe stomach pain and was hospitalised often.
It was manageable when she was home, but difficult when she moved abroad. After her O Levels, Samirah enrolled in a pre-university institution in Kuala Lumpur (KL), Malaysia. When her condition flared up, I would take urgent leave, and my husband and I would drive up to KL to be by her side.
But when she went to Belfast, Northern Ireland, for her university degree, it got really tough. While the medical professionals there were more familiar with her condition and she received free medical treatment as a student, she struggled being alone.
Eventually, she fell into severe depression.
In March 2022, I had to make a decision: Stay in my teaching job or quit to take care of my daughter full-time in an unfamiliar country.
I had to consider my financial situation. Even though my other daughters, aged 28 and 27, were able to support themselves, it was tough to leave a stable income as my husband and I were both supporting our parents.
I also had to consider the responsibility I had as a teacher. I was teaching O-Level students then and to leave in April meant that I couldn’t guide them for the rest of the year.
But I knew being a mother was the biggest priority, so I took a risk and left the service.
After ensuring that matters would be cared for in our absence, my husband – who had decided to retire to be with Samirah – and I flew to Belfast to be with our daughter.
Since then, I’ve taken care of her, accompanying her to medical appointments, and supporting her.
Leaving my job and the rest of my family was a scary decision. I was aware that I’d lose my income – I didn’t know if we could survive on just our savings – and I wasn’t sure if Samirah would get better.
But I didn’t want to overthink it. I just knew that my daughter needed me and I had to be there for her.
Samirah graduated later that year and secured a research job in Newcastle, and we moved there with her. For her, I would risk it all over again.
KAVITHA KRISHNAN, ARTISTIC DIRECTOR, 52
The risk she took: She opened two dance companies that welcome people with disabilities.