What may further classify anticipatory grief from after-death thoughts, said Tang, is oscillating between feelings of hopelessness and optimism. When their loved one is still very much alive and with them, carers may be unsure as to why they are grieving. All of these might cause them to experience more mental instability.
Unlike post-death pain, anticipatory grief is even “lead to feelings of isolation since it’s often less acknowledged or understood by others”, said Lim Pei Wen, a cultural work-trained senior programme executive with Allkin Singapore’s Senior Service.
It is a circumstance experienced by many in Singapore. ” Our ageing people means that many people are taking care of elderly parents or relatives,” said Dr. Lim, “leading to persistent feelings of preemptive pain, especially as they deal with the reality of their loved one’s declining health.”
ARE THERE STAGES IN ANTICIPATORY GRIEF FOR Caretakers?
If you’re thinking of the stages of grief identified by famed psychologist William Worden in Tasks Of Mourning, anticipatory grief does n’t always follow like so: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.
Otherwise, the emotions “tend to shift and clash, making it more difficult than anguish following a reduction”, according to Dr Lim. ” In Singapore’s environment, caregivers often struggle with thoughts of work and guilt, while balancing thinking for a loved one and personal commitments”, he said.