Grace Millane's mother wants to 'make the world a better place'

Grace MillaneMillane family

Grace Millane had dreamed of travelling the world since she was a little girl.

“I found a school project she did about New Zealand and it said ‘I’m going there one day’. And she did get there,” her mother Gillian says, proudly.

Growing up in Wickford in Essex, Grace was a livewire who made friends wherever she went.

“She was my best friend, we would always disappear to the pub for a quick drink and we would go away on holiday together,” Gillian says.

Gillian and Grace

Gillian Millane

Five years ago, after graduating from the University of Lincoln, Grace set out on a year-long solo backpacking adventure across the world.

After a six-week tour of Peru, she arrived in New Zealand. Less than a fortnight later, on the eve of her 22nd birthday, she was strangled to death by a man she met on a dating app.

Grace was constantly in touch with her family but had not responded to their birthday messages on 2 December, so they reported her missing to the police.

Gillian was recovering from surgery for breast cancer and not able to join the search. Her husband, Grace’s father David, flew out to New Zealand but a week later, their daughter’s body was found in bushland on the outskirts of Auckland.

Missing poster for Grace Millane

Millane Family

During a three-week trial, the family had to sit through her killer’s attempts to pass the murder off as “rough sex” gone wrong and his claims that Grace asked to be strangled.

“I felt like Grace was on trial and she couldn’t defend herself. As a parent, I didn’t want to listen to that. It was horrendous.

“You can’t ask for your own death. It is ludicrous this can be used as a defence.”

A jury unanimously convicted him of murder and he was sentenced to life in prison.

The family decided never to mention his name again. “We never say it. It’s a waste of energy. I don’t care about him, I don’t think about him,” Gillian says.

Gillian has since campaigned against the rough sex defence, with the charity We Can’t Consent To This, and has helped to change the law in England and Wales.

Two years after Grace’s murder, Gillian’s husband David died from cancer, which left her in a “really dark place”.

Millane family

Millane family

Gillian credits her family and friends, long walks and “lots of counselling” for her still being here today.

“I did contemplate suicide. That is a horrid place to be. But I couldn’t bring any more sadness to the family. Grace had such a bright future and it was taken away from her and us.

“I will never see Grace in a wedding dress or see her grandchildren. This is a life sentence I’ve got. This is me until the day I die. But there is a light and I found it. You have to find that inner strength.”

Gillian Millane

John Fairhall/BBC

David died during Covid and they could not be together as a family but Gillian later threw a memorial party and it became a turning point.

“A friend dragged me up to dance. I wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do but I laughed and I looked around the room and everyone was smiling.

“My toes stay in the darkness but the rest of me is facing the sun a bit. Sometimes it goes up to my waist and I do go into that black hole but I have people behind me who support me.”

Christmas is a very difficult time for Gillian, so last year she decided to spend it climbing Mount Kilimanjaro, which was “incredibly emotional”.

Gillian Millane at the peak of Mount Kilimanjaro

Gillian Millane

“I went from not wanting to leave the house to climbing a mountain on the other side of the world.

“I had to train and be focused. I didn’t realise the power it was giving me and how much it was helping me.

“Everything was aching but I knew Grace and David would be pushing me up there. They wanted to still be here, they didn’t want to go, so I thought ‘right get up there’.”

Gillian left a stone for Grace and David at the top, in tribute to them.

“Whenever I go somewhere special, I put the stones there, so they are travelling. If someone picks a stone up and moves it, they go somewhere else.”

Stones left by Gillian Millane on Mount Kilimanjaro

Gillian Millane

Her efforts raised £33,000 for the White Ribbon charity, which aims to end male violence against women. Gillian received a thank you card from the charity, saying the money had been used to fund education programmes in 65 schools in the Hull area.

“I just want to raise awareness and get that message out there about violence against women so that no other family has to live this life I live,” Gillian says.

Four years ago, with her niece Hannah, Gillian started the charity initiative Love Grace. They collect donated handbags and fill them with toiletries for domestic abuse victims.

So far, they have filled 15,600 bags for women in the UK and across the world and they received an award from the prime minister.

Hannah O'Callaghan and Gillian Millane outside 10 Downing Street

Hannah O’Callaghan

Grace loved handbags, Gillian says, and each bag has a tag on it with her handwriting.

“It’s a simple idea but it has really taken off,” Gillian says. “We were just doing it for our grief so that Grace would never just be a number.

“They get this bag, they are not expecting it and they have gone through hell. We get hundreds of letters from people who have received the bags, it’s heartbreaking.”

a Love Grace tag on a bag showing Grace's handwriting

John Fairhall/BBC

the tag

Love Grace x

Next year, Gillian is applying for Love Grace to become an official charity and she will be training for a trek to Everest basecamp in September, with a plan to place two more stones there.

One day she hopes to travel to New Zealand, a country which Gillian says has really taken Grace to their hearts.

“I still get loads of messages of support from there. It wasn’t New Zealand or travelling that killed Grace, or anything she did. It was that individual.”

Five years on from her daughter’s death, living without Grace has not got any easier. But Gillian is still trying hard to face the sun.

“I should never have buried my child and certainly she should never have died the way she did. People keep saying I’m really strong but I don’t think so, I’m just a mum.”

Gillian looking at a photo of Grace

John Fairhall/BBC

She adds: “I am more resilient than I ever thought I was. I do think David and Grace would be proud. I think Grace would laugh and say these treks are a mid-life crisis.

“I will never get over it but I just know I’ve got to make the world a better place. I want to change things so that no other family has to go through what we go through. That has got to be a good thing.”

If you, or someone you know, is feeling emotionally distressed, BBC Action Line has put together a list of organisations which can help.

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'Godfather' of avocado toast chef Bill Granger dies, aged 54

Bill GrangerMikkel Vang

Renowned Australian chef Bill Granger – the “godfather” of avocado toast – has died.

A self-taught cook from Melbourne, Granger became a celebrated global restaurateur and food writer.

He passed away in a London hospital on Christmas Day, aged 54, his wife and three daughters by his side.

“He will be remembered as the ‘King of Breakfast’, for making unpretentious food into something special filled with sunshine,” they said on Instagram.

“He will be deeply missed by all.”

His cause of death has not been made public.

Over his 30-year career, Granger published 14 cookbooks, made multiple television cooking shows, and opened more than a dozen restaurants in cities like Sydney, London, and Tokyo.

Granger was beloved by diners across the world, but also by his fellow chefs.

“I’m heartbroken to hear this. So cruel,” food author and TV chef Nigella Lawson wrote on Instagram.

Meanwhile culinary legend Jamie Oliver paid tribute to Granger as “a wonderful human” and a “kind, calm soul”.

“I admired everything he represented in food,” he wrote on Instagram.

Granger began his career in 1993, after he dropped out of art school to open his first restaurant in Sydney when he was just 23 years old.

Bills – a sunny corner cafe – became renowned for simple dishes like avocado toast, ricotta pancakes with honeycomb butter, and top-quality coffee.

Its popularity exploded, and from there he opened offshoots abroad – including an entire chain of Granger & Co. restaurants in London.

Australian chef Darren Robertson said Granger had “changed the entire breakfast game” while Masterchef Australia alumnus Adam Liaw described him as “arguably [the] most influential pioneer of modern Australian food”.

“His ‘sunny’… codification of Australian cafe culture at Bills is the model on which every Australian cafe around the world is now built. Bloody great guy, too.” Liaw wrote on X, formerly known as Twitter.

Such was his impact that in January, Granger was recognised with the Medal of the Order of Australia – one of the country’s top honours – for his contribution to tourism and hospitality.

Speaking to the BBC in 2019, the chef reflected on the humble foundations of his breakfast empire.

“I’ve done all these extraordinary things, just from liking to cook pancakes and scrambled eggs, which is pretty amazing.”

Granger is survived by his wife and business partner, Natalie Elliott, and his three daughters, Edie, Inès and Bunny.

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‘It’s not just hormones’: Current management of postpartum depression falls short, more intervention needed

Multiple factors can increase the risk of a mother developing postnatal depression, said Dr Lee. These include:  

  1. History of depression or mental illness 

Women with pre-existing depression or other mental illnesses may be more susceptible to the negative emotions associated with postnatal depression.

  1. Past upbringing or difficult relationship with own mum 

Women who had a tough relationship with their mothers as children may carry emotional baggage into motherhood. This can cause them to exert too much pressure on themselves as new mums, eventually leading to heightened stress and a higher risk of depression. 

  1. Complicated pregnancy 

Women who had a challenging pregnancy, experiencing both physical and mental distress, may have heightened anxiety after giving birth.

  1. Assisted pregnancy (IVF or IUI) 

Conceiving through assisted reproduction such as in-vitro fertilisation (IVF) or intra-uterine insemination (IUI) can make the baby even more precious to the mother, intensifying her concerns about potential complications during childbirth and thus, increasing her anxiety. 

  1. Premature birth and NICU stay 

Mothers of premature infants, particularly those admitted to the neonatal intensive care unit, often grapple with anxiety and depression due to the intense worry they have about their baby’s health and treatment.

  1. Social factors 

Single mothers, those facing financial challenges, individuals with many children, or those lacking a supportive spouse or family unit may experience increased stress in caring for a newborn, thereby elevating the risk of postpartum depression.

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Woman paraded naked: A familiar headline in India

Students at a protest rally in Mumbai on October 2, 2020Getty Images

Earlier this month, a woman was stripped and paraded naked in India, sparking outrage. It’s a depressingly familiar headline, but legal experts and gender rights activists say the law is still not equipped to deal with such heinous crimes against women.

Warning: This article contains details some readers may find distressing.

It was sometime after 1am on 11 December when more than a dozen people barged into Sasikala’s [not her real name] house.

The 42-year-old was dragged out, stripped and paraded naked around the village, tied to an electricity pole and beaten for hours.

A resident of Hosa Vantamuri village in Belagavi district in the southern Indian state of Karnataka, she was being punished because her 24-year-old son had eloped with his 18-year-old girlfriend.

The young woman had been betrothed by her family to another man and was to get married the next day. Her furious family wanted to know where the couple were.

The police reached the village around 4am after they received a tip-off and rescued Sasikala and took her to hospital. She’s reported to be suffering from severe trauma. Her husband later told a visiting state minister that “my wife and I didn’t even know about the relationship”.

More than a dozen people have been arrested and a local police officer has been suspended for “dereliction of duty”.

The incident made national headlines and authorities took notice. Karnataka Chief Minister Siddaramaiah called it an “inhuman act” and promised justice to her.

The government also gave her some agricultural land and money, although authorities have acknowledged there could be no compensation for the humiliation she endured.

Karnataka high court Chief Justice Prasanna Varale and Justice MGS Kamal, who summoned the police and initiated a hearing on their own, said they were “shocked” that such an incident could take place in modern India.

But the incident in Belagavi is not really rare and several similar incidents have made headlines in India in recent years.

Protests in Delhi after a cellphone video of two Kuki tribal women being stripped and paraded naked emerge in Manipur in July 2023

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One such story that sparked global outrage came from the north-eastern state of Manipur in July. A viral video showed two women being dragged and groped by a mob of men before one of them was allegedly gang-raped.

The horrific attack had a political angle – Manipur was gripped by violent ethnic clashes involving the Kuki and Meitei communities.

But reports from other states show such incidents are often rooted in caste or familial conflicts, with women’s bodies routinely becoming the battleground.

In August, a 20-year-old pregnant woman was paraded naked in Rajasthan by her husband and in-laws after she reportedly left him for another man. A 23-year-old tribal woman in Gujarat was punished in a similar manner for eloping with another man in July 2021.

In May 2015, five Dalit women were paraded naked and caned by members of a higher caste in Uttar Pradesh after one of their girls eloped with a Dalit boy. In 2014, a 45-year-old woman in Rajasthan was paraded naked on a donkey after being accused of killing her nephew.

These are just some cases that made headlines, but there’s a general lack of data on such incidents. Some cases get politicised, with opposition parties raising them to embarrass a state government. But activists say women often do not report these crimes because of fear of insensitive questioning by the police and in courts.

“Cases involving assault of women are always under-reported because of shame. Families don’t come forward because it’s a matter of honour and the system does not support the survivors or give them a safe space to report these crimes,” says lawyer and rights activist Sukriti Chauhan.

In the National Crime Records Bureau database, disrobing is recorded under a broad description called “assault with intent to outrage [a woman’s] modesty”, which clubs the crime with cases of street harassment, sexual gestures, voyeurism and stalking. Last year, 83,344 such cases were recorded with 85,300 affected women.

Such cases are dealt with under article 354 of the Indian Penal Code and are punishable by a mere three to seven years in jail – which, Ms Chauhan says, is “grossly inadequate”.

“It’s a mockery of justice. Law works only when it deters. Right now this law is not a deterrent and that undermines women. It needs to be amended to enhance the punishment,” she says.

A protest in Ahmedabad on October 6, 2020

Getty Images

In the Karnataka high court, the justices also noted that the assault in Belagavi was watched by “a crowd of 50-60 villagers”, adding that “only one man tried to intervene and he was also beaten up”.

Highlighting the need for “collective responsibility” to stop such atrocities, the judges cited a case from the 1830s – when India was governed by the British – pointing out that an entire village was made to pay for a crime.

“All village people should be made responsible… Somebody could have tried to stop that,” they said.

Chief Justice Varale also invoked Draupadi from the epic Mahabharat, who’s saved by Hindu god Krishna when she’s being disrobed, to advise women “to pick up arms as no god will come to protect you”.

That advice, Ms Chauhan believes, is not practical.

“We are not Draupadis and there are no weapons to be picked up. Also, the onus cannot be on women. The law has to talk to the wrongdoer, but it’s still telling women that they have to find a way to stay safe,” she says.

“The message we need to get across is stop fighting your ethnic, caste and family battles on our bodies, they are not your battlefield,” she adds.

Maumil Mehraj, a research analyst who works with young people on gender equity, says the reason a woman’s body is treated as a battlefield is because it’s connected to her – and by extension her family, caste and community’s – honour.

“It’s always why women disproportionately have to bear the brunt during conflicts,” she says.

Such incidents, she says, also have an element of voyeurism because they are seen, photographed and filmed.

In Belagavi, she says, one of those arrested is a minor, indicating that such crimes have been normalised to such an extent that even the next generation has grown up with entrenched gender ideas.

“So will a law be enough to deal with such cases? I think the only solution is bringing up better boys. It’s necessary to teach them that connecting a woman’s body to her honour is problematic,” she says.

“It’s a Herculean task, but has to start early. Otherwise this vicious violence against women will continue.”

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For the love of animals: How these teenagers raised thousands of dollars for a cause close to their hearts

“A GENERATION OF ADVOCATES” The Bukit Panjang Government High School students are among SPCA’s 500 youth volunteers and fundraisers. These youths are aged between six and 24 years old, ranging from preschool to university students, said the organisation’s executive director Aarthi Sankar. Students from nearly 60 schools conducted fundraisers in supportContinue Reading

Chinese chess: Xiangqi champion suspended for bad behaviour

Men play Chinese chess in a park in the Jing'an district in ShanghaiHECTOR RETAMAL/Getty images

The winner of a Xiangqi, or Chinese chess, tournament has been stripped of his title after allegations of inappropriate behaviour.

Yan Chenglong has also been accused of cheating by using a communication device analogous to anal beads.

The 48-year-old has been stripped of his title and banned from playing for a year.

However, the Chinese Xiangqi Association (CXA) says it’s impossible to prove accusations of cheating.

Xiangqi has been hugely popular across Asia for hundreds of years.

According to the CXA, Mr Yan started drinking with friends in his hotel room shortly after winning the title of “Xiangqi King” at a national tournament held on the Chinese island of Hainan last week.

He then defecated in the bathtub of his room in an act “that damaged hotel property and violated public order and good morals”, said the CXA statement.

The CXA was forced to address rumours circulating online that Mr Yan had cheated using anal beads equipped with wireless transmitters to send and receive signals.

“Based on our understanding of the situation, it is currently impossible to prove that Yan engaged in cheating via ‘anal beads’ as speculated on social media,” the CXA said.

As punishment for bad behaviour, Mr Yan was stripped of his title and banned from playing for a year.

The association did not disclose the amount of prize money Yan was forfeiting, but Xiangqi tournaments often promise winners tens of thousands of yuan (thousands of dollars), according to AFP.

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Daihatsu pauses production over safety scandal

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Toyota-owned carmaker Daihatsu has closed all four of its plants until the end of January, after admitting it had falsified safety tests.

Daihatsu admitted that it had been manipulating safety tests on 64 makes for three decades.

Its headquarters in Osaka, Japan was the last to close, on 25 December.

The scandal puts in jeopardy 9,000 workers in the country and could affect global car giant Toyota’s reputation.

Of the 64 models involved in the scandal, 24 are sold with Toyota branding.

The closure of its Osaka plant follows closures in its production lines in Oita, Shiga and Kyoto prefectures.

Daihatsu said on Wednesday that it had stopped shipments of all its vehicles after its latest admission, which followed a transport ministry investigation.

It seems test results were falsified because of pressure to keep production rolling.

The company said it would work with its main suppliers to address the fallout from the scandal, adding that it may also help its smaller subcontractors that do not receive compensation to access support funds from Japan’s transport ministry.

It also said that during the time plants are idle it would compensate 423 domestic suppliers with which it has direct business relations.

Established 1907, Daihatsu sells around 1.1 million cars per year, which make up around 10% of Toyota’s 10 million vehicle sales per year.

“This first started in April where the issue was about collision tests being falsified”, motor industry analyst David Bailey told the BBC’s World Service. “Then, an independent commission by Toyota found more issues including air bags and speed tests.

“There’s no suggestion at the moment that the actual products were unsafe, but what seems to have happened is that they tested a car with components in and then sold a car with different components in, so that’s become a major issue”.

Toyota’s reputation was damaged in 2009 by a recall over a fault with some floor mats and accelerator pedals, and in 2012 it recalled more than seven million vehicles worldwide, including some Yaris, Corolla and Camry models over faulty window switches.

The recalls led to a “fundamentally changed” Toyota, says Mr Bailey.

“It stopped growing so quickly, it focussed again on quality, it brought in outsiders to really check quality – yet that doesn’t seem to have applied to its subsidiary Daihatsu”, he said.

Many analysts are suggesting that the pressure to grow has affected many carmakers, citing the example of Volkswagen whose diesel vehicles were found to emit more emissions than advertised. In 2015, the US said VW had violated its Environmental Protection Act.

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Police appeal for information on 15-year-old girl missing since Dec 18

SINGAPORE: The Singapore Police Force (SPF) appealed for information on Tuesday (Dec 26) on the whereabouts of a 15-year-old girl who has been missing for eight days.

Farzana Marita Devanandh was last seen near Block 891 Tampines Avenue 8 on Dec 18 at about 8.35am. 

Anyone with information can call the police hotline at 1800 255 0000 or submit the information online.

All information will be kept strictly confidential, SPF said.

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